Welcome to the *Just Whelmed* Blog

Hooray!  The ‘Just Whelmed’ blog is ready! I Want to Be 'Just Whelmed'

This is a special blog for people who want to be “Just Whelmed” instead of either OVERwhelmed or UNDERwhelmed.  Whenever you are here, you will find a growing set of questions, answers, tips, ideas, and resources to help you live a life of being “just whelmed.”

Many of the ideas that you’ll find here have been shared by the wonderful members of the Just Whelmed Research and Development (R & D) team.  This team was invited by – and has been assisting – Meggin McIntosh, the creator of this site and its sister site, http://www.JustWhelmed.com/.  Meggin sought out the R & D team as she began crafting the Just Whelmed “Wee” Weekly Workshops, which you may learn more about by going to the main Just Whelmed website.

 

Downshift Your Responsiveness When You Work at Home

Many people today feel pressure to be immediately responsive to every request, no matter when it is received, no matter from whom it is received, and regardless of the method it is delivered. So that you can focus and be more productive in your writing when you work at home, may I respectfully encourage you to “downshift” your responsiveness in these areas:

1. Answering the door: Just because someone is knocking on your door or ringing your doorbell does not mean you have to answer, particularly if you don’t know who the person is. This is particularly true if you are alone in your house.

2. Answering the phone: More and more, no matter how many “do not call lists” you are on, your home phone seems to be fair game for “surveys,” “checking on your satisfaction with our service,” political calls, and any number of robo-calls. It’s horrid. Either let your machine pick up, screen the calls and only pick up those from people you know, or just call back those you want to talk with. There’s no need to be like Pavlov’s dogs with the sound of a ringing phone. Many people write at home and supposedly do so because there are less distractions. Make sure you don’t allow the phone to distract you.

3. Text messaging: I think my articles are read by adults, so I will be hopeful that you are not texting all day everyday (because if you are, your writing agenda is sorely behind!) However, even though text messages can be incredible convenient and offer opportunities for real-time problem solving, they can also be a major distractor and detractor for productivity. Downshift your responsiveness on texting, as appropriate.

4. Friend (or connection) requests on Facebook, LinkedIn, or Twitter (or other Social Media): That’s all I’m going to say. It’s not urgent and it’s not important. Get to it when you get to it.

5. Face to face requests from people in your family: If you “hop to” any request, no matter how minor and no matter what else you are engaged in at the time, begin to downshift your responsiveness. You are not anyone’s servant nor at anyone’s beck and call. Be reasonably responsive to reasonable requests.

That last sentence applies for all of these. Be reasonably responsive to reasonable requests. If someone makes an unreasonable request, well, then I would carefully consider any response to that request.

If you will downshift your responsiveness in the five areas I have listed above, you can “upshift” your responsiveness and productivity as it relates to writing. And isn’t that what you want?

And for hundreds of sets of Top Ten Productivity Tips like these – with a whole series dedicated to writers – you’re invited to join others around the globe who subscribe (free) to one of the Top Ten Productivity Tips series.

Decision Doors – What Is Lying Through the Doors You Are Not Opening? Both Good and Bad

In life, you have probably kept some doors shut on purpose and you’ve had some you’ve never even thought about opening.

Let’s think about what could be lying through doors that are not currently open for you (and this is just a list for you to get your thinking going) – and we’ll start with positive possibilities. Use these to prompt your “upside” thinking.

 

  • More joy
  • More people
  • Certain special people
  • Certain experiences
  • Particular tasks
  • New views of yourself
  • Language(s) – not only to learn but the learning that comes from being exposed to others’ use of language
  • Hobbies
  • Security
  • New or different jobs
  • Responsibilities
  • Events
  • Destinations
  • Commitments
  • Belief systems
  • Groups
  • Trust
  • Health
  • Clothes
  • Foods
  • Relationships
  • Wealth
  • Smells
  • Tastes
  • Time
  • Change
  • Stability
  • World views
  • What else?

Now what about the possibilities that lie on the other side of doors that are “not so positive?” Just use these to get your own thinking going:

  • Some pain
  • Some foci (in terms of things that you might think about or spend time and energy upon)
  • Certain people
  • Certain relationships
  • World views
  • Some experiences
  • Various tasks
  • Particular views of yourself
  • The use of some kinds of language (which conveys certain thoughts that you want to close off)
  • Activities
  • Disease
  • New or different jobs
  • Responsibilities
  • Events
  • Destinations
  • Fear
  • Commitments
  • Groups
  • Clothes
  • Instability
  • Foods
  • Belief systems
  • Relationships
  • Smells
  • Tastes
  • Time
  • What else?

As I am sure you can see, some of the words or prompts are on both lists, but not all. It’s worth going through each list (and your own list thinking both “upside” and “downside”). “Belief systems” is an example. Sometimes, there are belief systems or ways of viewing the world that you have never even considered and once you find out more, you realize that there are portions of those beliefs and views that are a match for you and what you want. Thus, if you didn’t open the door to being exposed to other thoughts and beliefs, you would never find this.

Likewise, there are particular world views that you already know, for whatever reason, are completely out of synch with your views and you want no part of those in your life, and you know those are on the other sides of some doors – and may then decide to close or keep the door closed on those.

Can you begin to see that there is not just one giant door that is either open or closed? There are many, many tiny doors that we get to choose to open or close.

For some of you, you can get the same image in mind I got as I was writing this, i.e., the the image of an Advent calendar, which some of you may have seen. For the weeks of Advent, leading up to Christmas, there is a tradition of opening tiny little doors to read a Bible verse, get a special treat, or find a quote or good wish. Life is more like one of these calendars, i.e., there are many doors to either open or close each month, each year… and this goes on throughout our lives – not just during the Advent season.

Flora Whittemore, said, “the doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live.” We explored that idea related to our decisions and our lives in five sessions (all of which are recorded and available). You are welcome to visit here, where you’ll see them listed.

We’re having a great time with the Staying Positive Society!

Feeling Schizophrenic

One of the R & D team members says her story involves feeling schizophrenic.  I’m wondering who else can identify:

I am a highly intelligent, self-motivated person who is getting the life sucked out of me because of the politics and bureaucracy that I spend my work day mired in. Further, my particular department makes decisions on a dime – which results in going in a different direction every time the President mentions she likes something – that becomes our new focus instead of making deliberate decisions that further our mission and would achieve success.

As if this is not enough, I work in an institution that is rife with supervisors that are bullies (starting at the top) which messes with the whole ability to achieve as an employee, and crippled workforce. Lastly, I work in an academic institution, for heaven’s sake – and some people really do believe in the “ivory tower” myth. Which means that we don’t operate as a functioning business, everything is studied or talked about to death, which limits creativity and the ability to actually get things done. (I know this sentence and the second sentence contradict each other, but now you know the reason for my schizophrenic behaviors!!!)

—————————-

Suggestions?  Thoughts?  Solutions from anyone?  Please comment.

 

 

Who Wishes She Had a Supportive Supervisor?

Someone, who asked to remain anonymous for obvious reasons, responded thusly when asked, ’What one change would you make to allow for a peacefully productive work environment:

The change in my environment that would make me more peacefully productive would be to have a truly supportive supervisor that valued what I did.  I know I am dispensable to this person because she tried to dispense with my unit/function and move me to into a related but “lowly” role (where people start out in my occupation). 

Thank God, the faculty and deans protested loud enough that I was able to move back to where I belonged.  With a supportive supervisor, I wouldn’t sweat the possibility of losing my job, and I’d get back the administrative assistant I had under the previous administration.  If I could just get out from under all the clerical tasks I have to do, I’d be plenty more productive.

——————

Meggin says:  I happen to know this person – and if she has a supervisor who doesn’t recognize her level of talent, brilliance, and contribution…well, then I would have to wonder what’s wrong with the supervisor.

Maybe she has some “issues,” maybe?

Anyone else have a thought to share on this?

Are Academic Women More or Less Overwhelmed – and Why?

Recently, I asked this question of about 200 academic women:

What percentage of the women you know could use some help with being *just whelmed* (vs. overwhelmed or underwhelmed?  Feel free to offer some explanation along with your answer.  Note:  In this series of posts, I’ll offer some of their responses (and all will be offered anonymously, as requested).  Other posts on this blog will have the person’s name associated with her comments, but not this series.

Among College of Extension female colleagues, almost all verbalize feelings of “overwhelm.”  However, there are those who seem to thrive in that state, despite the grousing. Probably half would be interested in help managing the feeling, but only a few would carve out the time to take action.

What are your thoughts?  Have you seen this pattern?  Click on the comments link above and you’ll see the box where you can respond.

Establishing Systems – Where Did I Put My Keys?

Here is a response one of the Just Whelmed members sent me after listening to the Wee Weekly Workshop lesson on establishing systems.  She writes:

“Just listening to this (Wee Weekly Workshop lesson on establishing systems) and I had to laugh at the one about “where did I put my keys?” In my office I hang them on the light switch so that when I leave I turn out the light and when I’m in my office the light is on (the light switch is just strong enough to hold the keys up.) Gives a little “go green” to my life in my office.  I recently purchased a lamp to use instead of the overhead lights, now I’m still trying to figure out where to put my keys because when the overhead light is off, my keys won’t hang there.”

You may have systems for your keys – or you may need a routine for your keys.  Let’s share ideas here!!  Just put yours in the comment box.

Taking a Bold Action – Could You Then Be More Productive? Would You Feel More Alive in Your Life?

Are you ready to take a bold action? Could you be more productive if you were more bold?

“Fortune befriends the bold.” ~ John Dryden

Is bold a word you use to describe yourself, your behaviors, your thoughts, and your actions? If you haven’t imagined yourself as bold – up ’til now – What do you need to be bold about? Here are ten prompts to consider:

  1. Do you need to make a bold claim? What statement do you need to pronounce to yourself or others?
  2. Do you need to set a bold goal? Why have you been holding back?
  3. Do you need to make a bold break? Maybe from a relationship, a job, a marriage, a city, a lifestyle, a role?
  4. Do you need to have a bold conversation? You already know the answer to this, don’t you? You have a person with whom, if you had a bold conversation, it would change everything for you (or for the person).
  5. Do you need to engage in a bold cause? Look around. What troubles you on the deepest level in your neighborhood, your community, your organization, your country, your world? Do you want to get involved in solving that?
  6. Do you need to make a bold physical change in yourself or your environment? If you could, what would you do and why? Decide if you want to take the steps you need to take.
  7. Do you need to deliver a bold testimonial? What or who do you need to stand up for? How would you go about delivering this bold testimonial?
  8. Do you need to offer a bold alternative? Please, don’t hold back! Every situation needs alternatives to consider. If you have a bold alternative way of thinking or acting or responding, offer it so that it can be considered.
  9. Do you need to make a bold decision? Fear often holds us back from making the bold decisions, but we know perfectly well what those decisions could be. What is yours?
  10. Do you need to find a bold friend and accountability partner? It’s possible just to set something up with a MasterMind group, a special friend, or a trusted family member. You can also hire a coach who can be your bold friend and accountability partner. This person could also help you take action on any of the previous nine prompts.

See if one of these questions helps you think about an area where you want to be more bold. What could open up for you if you were more bold?

For many resources to support taking bold actions, including publications, weekly tips, coaching, and more, just access Meggin’s website and see what is there for you.

Simplifying – Rich and Wise Suggestions

Here are some Rich and Wise Suggestions for what to get rid of or stop doing from Joy Randall as you venture on the path of simplifying your life:

Being responsible for other’s feelings.

Doing this stopped the “chameleon” effect in my life of spending productive time mind reading what other want and confirming myself to their image.  Now I can be just me, respectful of others, and meet their needs WITHOUT invalidating my existence.  Becoming visible to myself and others.  The burden of perfection has
started to fall off my shoulders, and I get to be me, period.

Being a victim.

Well now!  I no longer have to carry around a sorry sack of excuses, whining, and justification for NOT doing anything, wheew!

Keeping everything people give me, just because they gave it to me.

I like clean, clear, bright spaces to work in because it gives me a sense of just whelmed.  Keeping other’s gifts, books, pictures, nick knacks, tools kept me feeling overwhelmed by other’s expectations, desires, and designs for me.

Answering my cell phone just because it rings.

Who wrote the rules that the cell phone is a direct conduit to us – our attention, brain power, time, etc. – that takes way  a sense of space and peace.  Always being at someone else’s beck and call leads to overwhelm that circumstances or others rule our well being.

• Using Meggin’s method of brain dump and ONLY putting small chunks in swift file or to-do list.
Creativity is back!

What Boosts Your Energy?

What boosts your energy and just “lights you up” – personally or professionally?  You are just a fuller YOU after these times, interactions, experiences, etc.  What are those?

Here is  Yehudit Reishtein’s joyous answer:

What energizes me?

  1. Finishing a project–it can be a project like writing an article, cleaning and reorganizing a room, or filing final grades for the term (some of these finished projects give me a small boost, some a big boost)
  2. Hearing from a student that I made a difference in his/her learning or writing
  3. Mastering something I’ve been having trouble with (had a conversation on the telephone, all in Hebrew!)
  4. Doing something productive with grandchildren (reading alternate pages of book with 4th grader, painting with 5 year old, etc)
  5. Lively discussions of issues with peers

What energizes you?  Tell us, please!

 

Time is free . . . but priceless

Thoughts on time shared by Natalie E. Ehleringer:

Time is Free, But It’s Priceless.

You Can’t Own it, But You Can Use it.

You Can’t Keep it, But You Can Spend it.

Once You’ve Lost it You Can Never Get it Back.”   ~ Harvey Mackay.

If you have a regret about time you’ve lost…what is it?  And most importantly, what will you learn from that experience?  Please post your comments.